How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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You're a big fat monkey.

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

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Im black and want attention. I also love fried chicken and love Africa call for a good, African-American time..... Im black 4025406623

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Q: A giraffe fell in a hole and died. Which was taller the Lion or Giraffe? A: The Giraffe was before it died

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

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A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

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Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

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What's the difference between sand and menstral blood? I can't gargle sand

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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