How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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every cloud has a silver lining

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What's worse than cutting yourself? Deadly tornadeos.

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whats brown and has wings? a stick, i lied about the wings bit

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

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What's worst than the holocaust? Coming home and having your parents say " we received an email from your teacher today"

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How dis the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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deez nuts

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Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

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Your mommas so fat she jumped into the ocean and immediately had to start swimming.

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Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

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i have a story to tell u!!! oh s*** i forgot!

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What did Helen Keller say when she was hit by a bus? . : ; : . : . :

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Why do fat people commit suicide

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to one tree? nailing 1 baby to ten trees.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Because 6 was registered as a sex offender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops