A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

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A group of blondes rent a car and decide to drive to Disney World. Along the highway, they see a sign reading "Disney World left." They exit the highway, turn left, and enjoy their well-deserved vacation from practicing law.

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Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

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A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

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What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

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What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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Why did the boy's house get destroyed? It was bombed.

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A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

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Yo Mama is so fat that she should probably make an appointment with a bariatric surgeon.

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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