What did the cashier say to the blonde? That will be $5.39, would you like a receipt?

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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Two guys walk into a bar, and they ordered two drinks. Then the bartender said, "Two dollars, please." - Brandie PANG

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did you hear about the dyslexic journalist? he employed an assistant to double check his work. They worked really well together.

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

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What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

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Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

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im telling maguire

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The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

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What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you racist bastard!

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What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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Why did little Susie Fall in the well? She had downs.

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Four brothers joined the army and were deployed to Iraq. Two of them committed suicide.

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Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

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Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

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Why did the man have a really short temper? HOW THE **** SHOULD I KNOW???

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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in superbad, why couldnt seth take off mclovin's face and wear it as his own? no one can. theyre fictional characters in a movie

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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