Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's black and doesn't work? My blackberry

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

thumb_up thumb_down -25

When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: Why is little Timmy living without his parents? A: He is ninety seven years old!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's the one good thing about being a paraplegic? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

An irishman walks into a bar and stays there until he goes home.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What really killed the dinosaurs? ME!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops