knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

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Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

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What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

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When my parents said that they chucked a flipper baby into the Atlantic ocean I assumed a baby seal, I later found out that happened to my disabled brother.

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I have a really funny joke.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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Try not to laugh at this joke... Knock knock Who's there? Ha ha ha Ha ha ha who? I told you not to laugh

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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1st black guy: get a job 2nd black guy: i have one 1st black guy: okay

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

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What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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whats the difference between a black man playing basketball and a white man playing basketball? They are different races

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what do call a girl with a waterslide nose? Ava Sherman

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What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father ****s on his desk.

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A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

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Whats grosser than a bloody hand? 2 bloody hands.

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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What do you call a man with a spade stuck in his head? An ambulance, he may be in need of urgent medical assistance

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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