What do a boat and a computer have in common? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

This is an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road? Systemic oppression.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

knock knock. who's there? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's read,bubbly and looks out the window? A baby in a microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

The Chicken was crossing the road one afternoon, he was fined by a police officer for J walking He made it to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops