A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

I need a side cart on my motorcycle just for my diick

what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

why did the child kill his mother because the child gave his mom AIDS

Why was Ethan talking to the potato? Because he is stupid.

A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

what does idk mean? i dont know!! nobody knows!!

Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

What's the dumbest animal in the rainforest? A polar bear.

sky silverstein

What's worse than a black guy? Two black guys....and a dead white man.

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

How can you tell if your blind date is going to be good looking? Go on the date and see if they're good looking.

Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

So a woman walks out of a kitchen, she is instantly mauled by a bear.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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