What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

Where would canada be without nature? still here

A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse replies: "my wife has terminal cancer."

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

blargen fa-diddle nachen!

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

a lady says, " i cant stand this." Th guy next to her had his legs blown off and will never be able to stand again.

Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

Women's rights

Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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