I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

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What's Gay and has a penis? Justin Bieber, I lied about the penis

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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A man said to another man," you are so stupid you climbed a glass wall to see what was on the other side." The second man said," well you were on this side of the wall and I'm going to kick your ass." The second man had been drinking that night.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

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A lion and a cheetah raced each other and the cheetah won Lion: "man you're a cheetah!" Cheetah: "no you're lion!" Then the cheetah tears off the lions head and feeds it to their babies

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

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A: Who keeps knocking on the wall? B: My neighbors have sex a lot. A: We should knock back.

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You had 10 bricks on an airplane, you throw one. How many do you now have? 9. How do you get the elephant in the fridge? Open the fridge put the elephant in. How do you get the giraffe in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in. There was an animal meeting, all animals were invited. Which animal was missing? The giraffe, because he's still in the fridge. An old woman wants to cross a river that was full of crocodiles. How does she cross without getting eaten? The crocodiles were at the animal meeting, so she got across safely. She dies anyways. What happened? She was hit by the brick.

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"How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?" "Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door." "How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?" "Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door." "The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend.... except one. Which one?" "The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator." "There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat." "You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting."

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you're momma's so fat, and i like fat chicks. is she home?

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Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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-Is this the Krusty Krab? -Yes, how can I help you?

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i'm hard

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what did rishi say to jess ? GOOD ONE

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A fat guy!

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a ginger named corey walks into a bad and gets pistol whipped after raping his classmate

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

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A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said, "No change. He's likely to die, too."

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I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? The sandwich is hidden under the couch, and is non-migratory.

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why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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