A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

A hairy monster walks into a bar. It was halloween.

Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

Roses are red, violets are red, sunflowers are red, HOLY CRAP, MY GARDENS ON FIRE!

Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

Why can't Hellen Kelller drive? Because she's a woman.

If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

Why was Blue looking for her clue. She was drugged by a stranger and ended up inside of Mailbox.

roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

Yo momma is so stupid, she is in rehab and will unlikely get over her mental illness leading to her soon and fatal death.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...