How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

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Why was the boy at the funeral? Because he was dead.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

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Homo say what?

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What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

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Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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What Do call a dog with an e A doge

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Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

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What does? 42

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Why did the blonde fail her drug test? She's actually never did drugs before but since she didn't show up for appointment, that counts as an automatic fail.

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What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

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Whats bad about being a black jew? You have to sit in the back on the oven.............

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The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't sexual abuse, which her sister had experienced while traveling around the world in 2007.

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What do you say to the woman who just got raped? Nothing you just raped her

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Why couldn't little Jimmy play catch with his dad? Because he was an orphan.

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All of these jokes suck; so I just made one that equally sucks!

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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