Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

Yes

What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

What' worse than random Holocaust jokes? The Holocaust

Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

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q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

Why was the walrus wearing braces? It wasn't, because it his highly unlikely that people would care about a walrus's dental issues. The walrus would most likely cope with his irregular teeth and move on with its life.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

Yo momma so pretty,she gets a lot of compliments.

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? several.

all these jokes are horrible now

How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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