If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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Call of Duty Infinite Warfare

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But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

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Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

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Why can't the orphan play baseball? He can't find home.

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What separates man from animal? Divorce.

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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Brain fart

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Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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Why did the Nun refude to say Thank You Father? Because she was raped by her father as a child.

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What did the mother say to her son when she saw his report card? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

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Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

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Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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