Last week, one of my ex girlfriends called me. She said she had to tell me some bad news. "I don't know how to tell you this but I have AIDS. I really didn't know how to reply to that so I said the only thing I could say. "Yeah, I know."

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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if you press the thumbs up button nyan cat is going to visit you tonight

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family killed themselves.

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Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

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You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

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What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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Q. How much Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A. None, they just steal one.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Q:what's faster than a black man with you t.v A:his brother with your laptop

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if you have 2 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 4 oranges and 1 apple in the other, what do you have? very large hands.

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Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daffodils are yellow, Flowers come in lots of colours...

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What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

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what has two legs and is red all over a fireman doing his job

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What do you call a black person pimping out his bitches? a dog breeder.

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Q: Knock, Knock A: To get to the other side.

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What did one ginger say to the other We have red hair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops