What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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A:Who am i "RRRRRR' B:A pirate A:No im fetty wap

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

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Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

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Two peanuts walked into a bar one was as'salted'

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Who ever invented the "Knock- Knock jokes" should get a "No-bell prize"

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Get up Look in the mirror

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Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

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Why so serious ?

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penisvaginaorgasm

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What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

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A black man walks into a store. As he leaves, the detector goes off. It turns out the sales clerk had forgotten to take out one of the tags on his purchase. The sales clerk promptly took it off, and the man left to enjoy the rest of his day.

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Did you hear about the Polish couple taking selfies while on vacation in Portugal? They fell off a cliff and died in front of their children. True story.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops