What do you call a penguin in the desert? Most likely a dead penguin.

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I have cancer. And you're next.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Hey! I just met you. And this may seem crazy. So here's my number: Now Get in the van.

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What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

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Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

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What is easier than making pie? Making cake!

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this website is a bad joke

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A gay man watches football.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? I DON'T have a Corvette in my garage.

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whats the hardest answer ever? The one without a question.

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I haven't read and I don't agree to the Terms of Service

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why do the jewish guy and italian girl talk? i dont know why any decent minded italian would talk to a jew so i don't know.

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- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

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What did the dinosaur say to the human? For one, dinosaur's don't talk. And two, humans were not roaming the Earth during this time.

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Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

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There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

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Neo Nero, why did you not tell me that Nero7 is dead? When was the funeral held? Where is he buried? At point Zero? Please I need to know, he was basically my father, or rather all that my father never was, at least I dont have to wonder if he will ever come back... I understand your anger, even if I am not even close to following your extreme ideals, please tell me the code, the proof that you are not one of the Spetznas or the Nazi`s. "Eliza"

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What has 389,236,587 arms, has rainbow colored fur, and fornicates on your front lawn? Absolutely nothing. That's pretty much physically impossible.

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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