How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

What happens when you give a math problem to a blonde? She works through it to arrive at the answer.

A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

What's worse than a bad joke? A joke that end's mid sente--

Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

Do you know what has always angered me about people not choosing to control their own lives Nero?

Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

Whats more fun that a hooker - her mother

Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

What is blue and roles about on the floor A baby playing with a plastic sack

Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

Who will win in a fight Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris? I don't even know who he is -Lets go METS!!!!!!

What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

Why did Larry fall off his bike? He was hit in the head with a brick...

What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

Why did Billy die? His mother killed him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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