A man walks into a restaurant and asks a waiter, "Do you serve crabs here?" The waiter says, "Certainly! In fact, stuffed crab is today's special."

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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An old man walks across the street. Several cars start to honk in irritation, for they are in a hurry and the man is walking quite sluggishly.

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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what did the pumpkin muffin say to the blueberry muffin? nothing, because muffins can't talk.

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so a unicorn walks into a bar... and then i woke up

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Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

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Your such a whore, you most likely cut your own clothes so people will see more of your body that they find physically attractive and make a partner for sex easier to obtain

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Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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Oooh. That fish smells delicious.

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A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

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My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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Yo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!!

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What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

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Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

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Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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