9/11

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What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

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roses are red violets are black,why is your chest as flat as your back :O

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An Anthony eats a juicy pickle.

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Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? 15 minutes in the oven.

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

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"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

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What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

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What did the man say to the other man? I would have no clue because I am deaf

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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Why did the black man fall down? A guy pushed him.

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

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Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

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If atheism is a religion, then not collecting stamps is a hobby.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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Why didn't the boy want his dinner? Because it was a bowl of vomit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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