A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

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A blind man who spoke English and a deaf man who used sign language went to a bar together. Although they didn't communicate they had a wonderful time.

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well thats a stupid question, just one.

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hi

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Did you hear the one about the deaf guy and the rhinoceros? Neither did he.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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NO I AM NEROCHAN LEFT!

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

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A man walks into a bar, and he died.

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What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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