A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than hitting your thumb with a hammer? Getting your spine ripped off

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy wuzzy had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why didn't Jenny's mom give her any Christmas presents? She was a selfish, mean, woman and didn't care about her children.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what came first the chicken or the chips

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats black and hangs from trees? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops