Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

What happens when you go swimming in the rain? You get wet.

You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

Why did the world end? Because of Jim Layhey's whispering winds of shit.

so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

Why do catholic priests enjoy the company of boys? Because they must remain celibate and cannot have children of their own.

hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

It was Jimmy's 18th bday so his parents let him have the house to himself. He ate shrooms, fucked his turtle, then had his dick bitten off.

What do you call your female dog? Your bitch

In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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