Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

Q. I look in a mirror. What do I see? A.My reflection

How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

Q: How do you catch a squirrel? A: Throw a fridge at it

Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

Why were the police chasing the black man? Because he was in such a poor financial state that the bank foreclosed his house and now he has no source of income and therefore no way to purchase basic living requirements, so he was forced to steal in order to provide food for his family.

Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

What's funnier than 24? 25

Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

Schizophrenia will affect over 1.5 million people this year. At least, thats what my flying, albino pet rhinoceros told me.

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They all say ouch and then continue walking. Although the minister did hit it at a higher speed and ended up with a black eye.

how do women get from the kitchen to the bedroom? they walk there.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

Obama = ebola

How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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