Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What`s the best part about twenty-three year olds? there are twenty of them

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I slept through the Dark Knight movie....turns out I was pretty tired.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

thumb_up thumb_down -24

yo momma so old that when she whent to school there was no history class

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What has equally bad consequences as breaking someone's leg in front of the local authorities? Breaking your own leg on purpose in front of the local authorities.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats fleash color fleash color and fleashcolor? a naked hobo rolling down a hill

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man walks up to his boss and asks "Do you want to hear a funny joke?". His boss replied,"Yes". Before the man could finish his joke, his boss had a heart attack and died instantly. The next day, when he's in his car with his wife, he asks "You want to hear a joke?", the wife replied "Sure,". before the man could finish his joke, a car hit them and the wife died but the man happened to survive. The next day, he sat on a bench mourning, his friend walked up to him and asked, "Why are you sad?". the man answered, "Every time I try and tell a joke someone dies!", his friend said, "That's not true, just tell me the joke." "Ok" "Two Pigeons walk into a-". Before he can finish his joke his friends is kidnapped and killed. Sadly, the man walks to a ledge, jumps off and commits suicide. The End

thumb_up thumb_down -26

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you get when you skin a potato? A screaming kid with autism and no skin.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? If i knew, I'd tell you.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

If you give a mouse a cookie, he will probably eat it then have a heart attack due to the high level of sugar in the cookie

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call a child sitting alone in the back of a bus? Anti-social and on the verge of depression.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, the enslavement of blacks over hundreds of years.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why do midgets wear condoms? To avoid unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops