Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

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Why did sally drop her drink? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock Knock. "whos there?" Not sally.

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Is that a gun? Or are you forcing your boner into my back? Or is it something completely different that shares the physical characteristics of guns and boners?

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PS3 has the exerrent technorogy and finersse to make excerrent gaming such as... ...ITS RIDGE RACER! RIIIIIIIIIDGE RACEEEEEEEEEEEER!

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What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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knock knock who's there? your destiny

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'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' That's fantastic because Peter Piper was paralyzed and the doctors said he would never be able tomove is arms or legs again, and there he is picking a peck of pickled peppers. I applaud you Peter Piper.

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What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

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Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

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I'm Coming

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Person 1: Happy Halloween! Person 2: Hey, I'm Jewish

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what did the blind man get for christmas? Cancer.....

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What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

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How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

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Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

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Why could'nt Ray Charles read: He was black

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A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was a serial rapist with a anger problem

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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