How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

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What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

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What did the boy with AIDS, polio, one eye and one arm get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because it was raining.

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Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

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why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

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A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

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What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

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whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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