Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

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Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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what did the kid with no legs gat for her birthday? A soccer ball! I feel bad for this young girl.

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Kid: "Tell me about when you were young, Grandpa." Grandpa: "Oh, sonny, those were crazy times. My friends and I were out of control. We used to give each other wet-willies and funny arm. We'd play dandy-balls and legs-a-spread and penis-butt." Kid: "Sounds kind of gay, Grandpa. " Grandpa: "It was gay. Everyone was. But, back then, we were called pole-fancies. It was real, good old-fashioned "grab the nearest tree and hold on for dear life" gay, not today's fancy, featherbed, thread-count gay. People got hurt back then! Kid "That's gay." Grandpa: "Yeah, it was pretty gay "

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

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Why couldn't the immigrant who was brand new to America hold a conversation with anyone? He was mute.

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Nerochan, it was really nice chatting with you, I hope we can chat some other time... Please tell me why you are upset with me, just pick up the phone, I mean let me know what I did you wrong.

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What is more annoying then finding a worm in your apple you

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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awkies when jamie and jacob hook up, and u have to tell the dog..i maen danni that this has been going on for 2 months

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A man walks into a bar not a duck though

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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