What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Why did the seagull fly over the sea, It had wings.

A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

Why did the black man go to jail? Because he committed a criminal offense.

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

What is the hottest day of the week? Wednesday

My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Well... My reputation is still kinda exaggerated apparently. What you experienced is called astral projection, some people claim it is the same as lucid dreaming, I beg to differ, the difference is vast. You basically just admitted that people believe much more in you, than you believe in yourself, without believing hypnosis does not work, people are like "bah its just suggestions", its true, but underestimating the power of suggestions is a pretty bad call.

Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

Did you hear why the peanut got arrested by walking next to another peanut? One got a-salt-ed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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