Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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How many children does it take to kill a homocidal killer? None. Children should not attempt such a dangerous task.

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Roses are red, but there are also pink, white and yellow varieties Violets aren't blue, they're violet, hence the name I've got OCD And my poetry skills are also lacking.

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Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No.

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Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

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9/11

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. What does one say to the other? Nothing. They are both inanimate objects and can't speak.

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Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

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Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

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Why did the man turn up at his friend's funeral dressed as Mickey Mouse? Because it would have been disrespectful not to attend.

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Daniel is a fag

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yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

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Q: what did one guy say to another guy? A: I don't know!

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I am gay.

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- why did the chicken cross the road? why? - to get to your house. - knock knock. who's there? - the chicken.

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How many candles did Johnny blow out on his birthday cake? The same number of candles which corresponds to his age.

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What is more disappointed the Lake Disappointment? You

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Why can't black people get sunburned? Natural selection allowed ancient Africans to develop a darker skin shade that would counter strong UV rays.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Things i like to do when im bored; chase after ostriches take major dumps masturbate give myself major erections EJ

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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