A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

your mom.

What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

Finally, lets take the fight two the streets shall we, no I am not asking, asking is for pussies: YOU VIOLATED AND KILLED MY FATHER! YES YES WHAT IS IT WITH YOU WOMEN ANYWAYS I VIOLATED YOUR MOTHER TOO, BUT YOU DON`T HEAR HER WHINING ABOUT IT! In fact tell her to stop her sending me nude shots, I prefer it when she sends me those she takes of you in your sleep... Your friendly Neighborhood R*pist Moral Man:The day Moral Man graced your village was the worst day of your life, for me it was fathers day! Literally, do you really think I killed your father? I would never comitt suicide! Now, let us celebrate our reunion with some... "Moral WINcest" Barlog: Yes we would like to see the tapes you made for me banging her mother. two Super Turbo edition hours later: YEEEEEEEEEEES! YEEEEEEEEEEEES!

What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

Q: WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SKINNY PERSON AND A JESSE? Answer: THE SKINNY PERSON IS VERY LEAN AND THE FAT PERSON IS VERY JELL-OUS

Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

What do you call a black man with a Ph.D? Doctor.

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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