What did the young Muslim man have attached to him? A book-bag, it was is his first week college and he eager for an education.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To return to the roost he had recently escaped.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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Knock knock, COME IN!

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Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

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We are few Nero, too few, if I want to split my money with you, would it help you find true happiness?

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

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Why did the man kill the hamster? To get to the other side.

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So a blond, a brunette, a ninja, a pirate, a priest, a rabbi, a mathematician and an engineer all walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What, is this some kind of joke?"

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

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Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A) The color of their hair.

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Do you know why the Mexican didn't like hot dogs? I don't know either.

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are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops