Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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How do you drown a blonde? hold her head down until she stops breathing

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

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How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

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My little league baseball coach measured the team for cups. Its 9 years later and we still dont have those cups.

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny becuase the robot had no arms.

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

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A family has been forced out of their house by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?... Their insurance company.

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How old was the baby when it took its first steps? That question is impossible to answer due to the fact the parents had an abortion and the fetus remained unborn.

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? cancer

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why is the sky blue? because your mother blocked your computer to meatspin.com

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If you dumb fooks keep swearing we are going to get banned.

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why did the man fall? cuz he jumped from a building

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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