What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

How do you beat a black in sports. "shot him when the game starts"

What did Tarzan say when the elephants came over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill!

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Obama being re-elected

What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

hi jonny

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

What do we call Osama? Osama

what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

Whats the similarity between a bike and a black person? They are both stolen

What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

More mindfuck: Your school is betraying you edition. How are you going to feel good about yourself, if you have to UNDER STAND everything you learn? Moral: If you dont get it, you are not ready.

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all broke beyond repair.

Roses are red viloets are blue mw3 sucks and bf3 is good

What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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