What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms? Because they weren't invented when he was alive.

What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

H2O corndogs running around naked CC

If you have a stroke, call 000

A jew, a black, and a gay are walking together. The black points out a new house.

The New York Giants

SUCK MY 29 AND A HALF FOOT LONG DICK BITCH JUST KIDDING............ IT IS 69 FEET LONG GIGADY

How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

What did the spoon say to the other spoon? Nothing, it is a spoon.

What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

Why couldn't the 11-year old get into the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

There is a bunch of penguins and they fall of a cliff

Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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