Why did Emily sit in a lonely corner? Because she just wanted to okay!

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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What's green and if you eat it you die? A Biljarts table.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

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I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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What did the pregnant teen get for Christmas? A miscarriage

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Faithful men.

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Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

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Why does ISIS want guns? Because they wanted to kill. Duh.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin that someone shot with red paintballs.

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Lol, okay you have made Nero of the clan of the Moralians the mighty laugh and go aww... Seriously, first of all, WHAT THE FUCK IS NAUSEUS? Secondly, okay its Ridge Racer, close enough, aww, seriously that sounds like the cutest thing, I mean did you bleed? DID YOU HARM YOURSELF! DELIGHTFUL... Moral: Seriously though, seeing you tilt over while playing a racing game, kinda cute, just put a pillow there next time you know just saying, because I play videogames, I cant go sexytime for hours without pumping some ADRENALINE INTO MY MIGHTY ROD OF STONEFLESH!

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What's sad about the Holocaust? Lots of men, women, children were brutally murdered in horrible ways.

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Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He lost his punch line. -by Ross

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What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

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what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

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So there is this moose and he goes to a grocery store and asks, "where are the potatoes?" the employee says "aisle 5" and when the moose checks in aisle five, there are no potatoes.

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How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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Why didnt Timmy Go to school? He Died.

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Is your refrigerator running? I hope so, or else the food will go bad!

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A priest, a Muslim and a Rabbi sit next to each other on a plane they say nothing to each other during the flight and reach their destinations safely.

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops