Dwarf Shortage

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Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

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Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

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Jerry Sandusky walks into an Under 21

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Fortunately, the bra was on display in a clothing store and was not actually being worn at the time.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Josh. Lettuce who? I didn't say "lettuce"... I said Josh.

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You're mama's SO stupid that when she applied to college, they were happy to help.

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A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

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Why do Mexicans always have heart burn? Because the food is spicy.

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What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

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What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

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Knock knock Who's there? Guess who. You have 4 options: A. Jeremy Stevens B. Donald Jefferson C. Richard Gillespie D. Paul Faggot Um A? Nope, the correct answer is D. Paul Faggot Oh hi Paul, come in.

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Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

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quiz is to quizzicle as test is to test___.

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A man walks into a bar and says give me a 84 bourbon, when he gets it he spits it out and says this is no 84 bourbon this is a 74 scotch, So he asks for a 68 brandy , when he gets it he spits it out again in disgust saying this isn't a 68 brandy this is a 87 whiskey!, than the old man next to him says here try this, the man says what is it?, the old man just says try it, so the man does, he spits it out and shouts this is urine!, the old man says correct, now tell me how old i am.

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Whats is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite. Whats worse than a shark bite? The Holocaust.

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What is blue and has to deal with a vagina. Blue waffle you know who has that Jews But the jews got it from the gassing and the gassing got it from hitlers wifes piss but the blue waffle came from the lesbian she had sex with when she was doing her lesbian phase but the lesbian got it from her father and the father got it from his wife.

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I am not physically scarred, rather mentally, lets just say my childhood was a lot less than pleasant, I got no idea where you got that "Nero lost an arm" thing, I got both arms working. But I guess I often feel alone because only I can feel, see and experience the pain of the scars a terrible childhood has left me with. You are right though, it is easy to give up saying that humanity is not ready or worthy, making me feel as Dr.Doom or something alike, hidden behind some suit of armor still ashamed for things I know that I am not, but that still burn deep within my mind. PTSD buddy, it does not matter if I logically believe that I am competent or not, when my past is engraved, etched into my soul, constantly telling me I am not, so helping others is actually pretty easy, yet saving myself, I do not know how anymore, it is easy to change the minds of those that have not been broken time after time physically and mentally by those which they love the most. I will heal, your words are inspiring, thank you.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

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If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? Tests.

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Vagina Boob

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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