Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

Who does creatine? James Cornish

whats worst then antijokes? the holocaust

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

what's the difference between a duck? You can't wash a window with a brick.

How are this and that alike? They aren't.

How do you make a Cowboy cry? You kill his family.

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

Communism hehe xd

A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

Why did the Italian family have spaghetti for dinner? Thats the only thing they had in the house

my boloney has a first name its OSCAR, my boloney has a last name its MEYER.. now bend over son while i shove my boloney in ur butt!

Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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