A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

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Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

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How can humans fly? Well if you run and jump of a cliff...nevermind you would just smash your face on the ground. I guess that isn't technically flying.

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? Pay a reasonable sum of money.

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9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

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How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

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Q: What do they call watermelons in Indiana A:watermelons

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what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

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how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

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Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

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what did the man say to the other man he bumped into? sorry. and they never saw eachother again

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

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Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

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Okay, you seem sincere enough, thing is that I trust you, but your buddies, if you can vouch for them, then I at least know that you are putting your stepmother in danger if you decide to cover for your friends, besides you being such an emotional crybaby kinda gets me into trusting you again.

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A: Knock Knock (waits for an answer) oh there's no one in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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