what has 52 teeth and holds back a monster? my zipper

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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What do a lamp and a elephant have in common? Big ears, except for the lamp, it doesn't have ears.

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

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what's black and can't swim?

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Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

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Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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Why was the man upset? Both sides of his pillow were warm.

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What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

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Why did the ceiling fall down? Because there weren't any walls.

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No your aunties a joke

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Why did your girlfriend dump you? because someone brainwashed this guy into believing this nonsense.

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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* anti-punchline

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

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What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

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Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. He did kill Hitler.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

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I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then I got stabbed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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