What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

What's red and bad for your teeth A brick

What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

Anti-jokes are funny.

What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

What's brown and sticky A stick

Knock knock. Its open.

Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

a. why? b. because I wanted

What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...