Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

- have you heard about the guy who got the left side off the body cut off? - no. - He died

How do you stop a black kid from jumping around in your bedroom? Chuck him out of the house.

What do Tutankhamun and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead

When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

What should you do when your husband is staggering in the back yard Shoot him again

A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because his hands were amputated.

What did Batman tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

Q: What's circlular and has two hands? A: A skinny person, i was kidding about the circular part!

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

A guy walks into a bar. He must have been blind or something.

What do you do when you see four black people and a Jew? You buy them

What's worse than a completely overused anti-joke punchline? The Holocaust.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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