What's worse than having no coffee at the office? Looking out the window on the 100th floor and seeing the cockpit of a Boeing 767.

Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

What is white and will kill you if it fell out of a tree? Charles Manson

Q: Were did the balls go? A: In the sack.

I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

My great grandfather died in a concentration camp. The poor guy fell off the guard tower.

Knock knock Fuck off!

jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

Why did the clown go to the doctor? Because he had a malignant tumor on his liver.

What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

once, my brother took my lard and gave it to the less fortunet

What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

DO U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD BIRD BIRD, BIRD IS THE WORD? DON'T U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD? EVERYOBODY KNOWS THAT THE BIRD IS THE WORD! Oh, no i did not know that the bird was the word.

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Everything.

-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

who is the shortest man in the world? ADITYA DEV

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

What does Pluto and a creamsicle have in common? Neither of them are a planet.

What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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