Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

Why couldn't the little boy see? His eyes were closed.

what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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