What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? When you think that there is no worm in your apple, but after your second bite you look down in disgust as you notice you have eaten half of the worm and see the other half wriggling about in your apple.

What's love like? Some people say it's like a lotus flower, others say it's like an orchid... Personally I'd like to say it's like a fire at the bottom of you're soul-- like when people sin and go to hell... that fire burns forever???

What's worse than accidentally flooding your bathroom? A Tsunami

To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of.

what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

Doctor, I keep believing I am stuck in the Matrix! Oh thats common, you know existencial crisis and so on but we got medications, you want the blue or the red pill?

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other boy fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third boy fall out of the tree? Prepressure

Why did the man have a really short temper? HOW THE **** SHOULD I KNOW???

my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

It's all Taggart

How do you shock a child? Attach a metal pole to them while there is a storm

What's worse than the Holocaust? Someone born in the 1970s feeling self-righteous about defending the victims.

What's the difference between a Pile of Dead Babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamboghini in my garage

What happened when my familys break on the car didn't work? They rolled down a hill and fell off a cliff and died. I loved them.

What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family LOLOLOLOLOLOL

Why was little Jimmy so sad? Because he was H.I.V. positive

a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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