Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

A man walks into a bar. And has a beer.

A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.

What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: He died on Christmas Day, before his parents could tell him they had maxed out their credit cards to take him to Disney World. His father has since relapsed into alcoholism. He knows his wife is cheating on him with another man, but understands that she needs comfort that he cannot give her.

Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

what is black white and red all over? A black and white movie with the first violent color leave a comment if this joke is duped.

a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Mega-saur-ass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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