Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

YOU-why did the airplane crash? (person): why? YOU-Because jimmy was flying it. (person): Who is jimmy? YOU- a fish.

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

whats better than nailing a baby to a wall? Ripping it off the wall.

Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

69

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

Knock Knock? Whos there? Not Madeleine McCann.

what's worse than pie? alot of things.

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...