Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

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Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

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What's the coolest place to be in the solar system? Uranus.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A joke.

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

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What's worse than finding The Holocaust in your apple? Most things, because that's impossible.

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Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, He sailed a boat.

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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Why did Jenny fall off her bike? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Jenny

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whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

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No your aunties a joke

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Why did your girlfriend dump you? because someone brainwashed this guy into believing this nonsense.

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

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Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. He did kill Hitler.

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* anti-punchline

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What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

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Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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