What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

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What did the parents say to their kid? You're adopted and we don't love you.

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A blonde girl walks into a car.

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A black guy , a white guy and a jew walk into a resturaunt They are offered the special.

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What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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I had a really great joke to tell you!

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yo mother is so fat, the recursive function computing her mass causes a stack overflow.

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How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

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Why do Asian men love noodles? Noodles are delicious!

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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guess what the clown said to the kid... im a clown

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How do you scare a little boy? You tell him everyone he loves was shot to death by you and then kick his guardian .

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Why did the bird plummet to the earth? It was shot.

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A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

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Why did the Chinese family eat a dog? Because they were poor and starving refugees.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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What happened when the lawyer went surfing? A shark came up and tore his leg off.

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dat shoe shine tho

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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