What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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What is black, white, and red all over? Rape.

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What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

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A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

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I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

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Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

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What noise does a Chinese roller coaster make? Chink Chink Chink Chink chink.....

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

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what's an advantage of breaking every bone in your body? nothing, you're screwed.

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Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

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Knock knock who's there? Gary Glitter ?_?

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Something other than a Human Being walks into a bar. The bartender then makes a rational decision about how to handle the situation.

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Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

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What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

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Q: What did little Jimmy get his grandfather for Christmas? A: Nothing his grandfather died on Thanksgiving

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Q: Where's the cheese? Who ate the cheese? A: How do you know it's been eaten because it's gone? Are you making the assumption that food that has disappeared was eaten because that is usually how food disappears? I am filing a lawsuit against you for your malevolent foodism.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

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What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

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a gay man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out for trying to seduce men.

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IMMA FIND YO ASS DO!!!!!

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Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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