What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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What stops a train? A missile

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A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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All of these jokes are about white people

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How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

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Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

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What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

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Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

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What did the chicken say to the.... nevermind

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Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

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Yo momma's so fat she weighs more than the average woman of her age and height

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why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

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What is the difference between a duck? A motorcycle because vests don't have sleeves.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

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guess what? bannanas

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead of getting hit by the plane because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and ever since he was 8 years old he has wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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What did Stevie Wonders wife do when they got into fights? Re-Arrange the furniture

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A man walked into a house, He never came back out as he fell down the stairs and snapped his neck, His family mourn him everyday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops