Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

Why did the black man get arrested? He sold cocaine.

A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

It's not just a boulder. It's a rock! A rooooocckk!

Did you hear the one about the nascar driver who couldn't pass his road test? No. It's true, he couldn't pass his road test.

I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

an irishman walks past a bar a.w. j.p.

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

yo mama so fat she had to eat healthy food and exercise daily

Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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