what do you say to a woman on her rags? nothing.try and ignore it.you didn't hear this from me and we never talked.

what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

What did Jim do after the police gave him a ticket? He followed them home and used their children's limbs to rape them.

A Black Guy, A Rabbi, And A Mexican walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says "Get Outta Here We're Closed!"

Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

A mother is sitting with her son at the park. A nearby man suddenly breaks into uncontrollable coughing. The mother leans over to her son and whispers, 'Smoker's cough.' The son never takes up smoking.

What did the bartender say when the black man walked into the bar? Hello, what would you like to drink?

Whats the most impotent thing to remember when your going skateboarding? A skateboard.

Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

what did katness save her Life? because peter hates her and katness is peaches and peter dies in the titanic because it is gay shut up becky

im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

Hej Erik och Leo!!

What's better than getting second place in the paralympics? Having legs.

How did the little boy die? Malaria Why? He was poor. Why? A Jew stole his money.

How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

Knock Knock Who's there? Eric, your old high school pal! Eric, you slept with my wife 3 years ago. You have her, please stop coming to my door and please stop saying your my pal. Pals don't sleep with other guys' wives.

Whats brown and sticky? A stick

What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

a blind man walks into a wall

A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...